One of the things I like to do, when introducing students to the idea that there's more to syntactic structure than just the order the words go in, is to expose them to sentences like (1), in which you can get two different meanings, depending on where you attach the prepositional phrase with cracks:
- The landlord painted all the walls with cracks (Hirst 1987: 172).
The nice thing about that particular example is that, as Hirst points out, people seem to get the silly, craquelure-with-malice-aforethought reading first, apparently preferring to assume that with, when it appears inside a verb phrase headed by a verb like paint, is being used in its instrumental sense to modify the whole verb phrase, and that only later do they get the sensible reading in which with cracks modifies the noun walls, telling you which ones the landlord painted. (My other favourite example is We sliced the pizza with the pepperoni.)
I was reminded of this, in a disturbing way, by an article in this morning's Star. The headline is in (2):
- Officer left messages for mistress buried in basement (Toronto Star, 19 June 2007, page A8)
As my eyes made the saccade from the end of the headline to the beginning of the first paragraph, my romantic imagination started anticipating the story. Workers clearing out the cellar of an old house, I thought, must have uncovered a cache of love letters that had been left there by some dashing young captain in one or another of the great wars of the last century. And now we have a touching and valuable piece of social history, a glimpse into the intimate lives of a couple from an earlier generation, living and loving in a time that maybe, just briefly, seems a little less remote—you can write the copy yourself. Anyway, the first sentence of the article came as a bit of a shock:
- A Toronto police officer kept phoning his longtime mistress, telling her how much he loved her, even though he knew she was dead and her body was walled up in his basement, a trial in Newmarket heard yesterday (ibid.).
Could I have been more wrong? The officer is a contemporary cop, not a long-dead captain in the military; the messages were voice-mail, not billets-doux; for mistress modifies left, not messages; and, grimly, buried in basement describes the mistress. For once I think of the sensible reading first, and the macabre one turns out to be right.